Leaning In

Leaning into pain.
I hate you for this.
Though you are right.
Repeating words.
Already known.

My trust is placed in you.
You are here to help.
Leading me through my mind.
Odd that you,
A stranger,
Can navigate the mess.

The fear.
A dark stone underneath my lungs.
Reaching out to touch it.
Suddenly changing.
A sticky mass of tar.
Growing rapidly.
Tugging my hand.
Trying to drown me.

And anger.
Two white rods.
Lodged in my kidneys.
Pulsating.
Hot and cold.
Grasping tight.
Burning and soothing.
Waves of pleasure and pain.
Unable to let go.

Loneliness.
A heavy steel bar
Lies across my chest.
Neither hot nor cold.
Run my hands along it.
Smooth and solid.
It's far to heavy.
To move it alone.

Finally sorrow.
Broken black wings.
Painfully twisted.
Pinned to my shoulders.
Wincing as I place my hands.
Massaging to ease the pain.

All reducing me to tears.
Near impossible to recover.
Slipping away into all the pain.
Laboured breathing.
Rendered immobile.
The light just out of reach.
I'm too weak to move.